20 Things That Make a Gentleman
Hello RH Family, I hope you have all been doing well. To begin, I wanted to personally thank you all for your overwhelming positive support and reaction to the Varsity Collection, Recreational Habits as a whole, and to The Art of a Gentleman series. Your messages and comments fuel our fire, and it has been such a joy to connect with many. Among the outreach, I am most commonly asked, beyond what we discussed in The Art of a Gentleman part I and II, what are some direct steps one can take towards embodying the RH Gentleman? So, I wanted to list my top 20 Things That Make a Gentleman. These are an outline and map that you can turn to and reference when you are ready to take the next step in becoming the best version of yourself for you and your community or use as a reminder when you want to get back on track because we all have off days, weeks or even months.
Please note that this list is not in order of importance, as being a gentleman at its best is a full 360-degree embodiment for you and your lifestyle.
1. A gentleman dresses well with intention - You dress for the job that you want. While I love sweatpants, we are far out of that era of the pandemic unless it is movie night with the family.
2. A gentleman is well groomed at all times - Take a shower, shave, put on cologne, iron your shirt, it will go a long way and also make you instantly feel more confident.
3. A gentleman has empathy - Treat others the way you would like to be treated. People are struggling right now, be aware and see how you can help. A lot of times people just need to be reminded that someone cares and is there for them if they need it.
4. A gentleman shows the same respect to everyone - There is never an excuse for treating someone disrespectfully, because at the end of the day that says more about you than about them.
5. A gentleman lives with purpose - Whether you journal at night or in the morning, having a list of goals and to-do's will give your life more structure and will also help to give you motivation especially when it can be difficult to jump out of bed in the morning. The list can be in an actual notebook, on your computer or even on the notes app on your phone, whatever will work best for your life and routine.
6. A gentleman is honest - Do not lie to others or yourself, it is a waste of time and energy. Live in your truth, for better or worse. Oftentimes being honest will benefit you tremendously even if it can be daunting in the moment.
7. A gentleman has Integrity - Be true to your word. If you made arrangements, promises, plans, do your best to follow through.
8. A gentleman always keeps calm - Anxiety builds on anxiety and that benefits no one. If you stay calm, you can think clearly and navigate the situation with clarity and ease.
9. A gentleman is never excessive - Sweet and simply, moderation in all things is key. The only exception is with love for your partner and family.
10. A gentleman acts more than he speaks - You know the saying; actions speak louder than words? Well, that's true. While we should try to communicate with our words, our actions are what really matter most and are what people will resonate with most.
11. A gentleman always has good eye contact - When someone is speaking to you, look them in the eye. It is a form of respect and lets the person across from you know that you are listening to them and are engaged in the conversation, and curious about what they have to say.
12. A gentleman knows his lady’s favorite cocktail - This is a sign of love, and a great example of acting more than speaking. Commit to remembering your lady's favorite drink to sip so that you can have it stocked at the house or order it for her when she is running behind on a dinner date. Happy wife, happy life!
13. A gentleman knows how to compliment - Compliments are not just reserved for your family but can be a great tool when connecting with a new person, colleague, business associate, or even a hostess. Turning to someone and complimenting their style is an easy conversation starter and leading with a compliment instantly makes the person you are speaking to happy.
14. A gentleman understands the art listening - If you are listening, you are better able to help, have empathy, and understand someone on a much greater level.
15. A gentleman has a signature scent - Your signature scent is a statement about you and your personality and may be, aside from appearance, the first thing someone notices about you. When picking out a scent ask yourself, are you serious? Are you outdoorsy? Are you mellow? Are you mysterious? Are you artistic? And then go with the scent you personally like the most, but it never hurts to ask a second opinion from a female friend before purchasing.
16. A gentleman has a signature drink - Having a signature drink will serve you well and also serves as a social que to others. From a Whiskey Sour to a Negroni, to beer, the questions you should ask yourself when picking a signature scent are the same when deciding the signature drink.
17. A gentleman knows that he knows nothing at all and is humble - You truly do not know what you do not know, so be continuously curious and flexible. You might learn something new.
18. A gentleman always does the right thing as a matter or principal - Sometimes doing the right thing can be hard in the moment but that is always the path you take. Doing the right thing is an act of selflessness.
19. A gentleman always opens the door ahead of someone - This is such an easy rule and should be or become an instinct.
20. A gentleman admits when he is wrong - Apologies are not a sign of weakness but of strength. We cannot be right all of the time, and truth be told at times we just outright mess up. We are all human and it happens, but when it does, apologizing is very important.
